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Say It Right Series

Chinese-Western Couple Relationships 中西夫妇和伴吕关系

Posted by hiewhongliang November 16, 2010 in the Group General Discussion.

老师同学们,大家好。

I am a new student on cpod, just signed up recently and awaiting my first contact with my teacher. I hope to learn much from all of you in this forum.

I am a native Cantonese speaker from Malaysia, and studied Mandarin while in school. I have since moved to Australia and unfortunately stopped using Mandarin for the last 20 years. I'm here to pick up where I left off.

I am married to an Australian and living in Brisbane. My wife is a university PhD candidate doing Psychology. Her project (surprise, surprise) is East-West intercultural couple communication, using our marriage as her inspiration. One of the reasons I am picking up my Mandarin again is that her research has sparked a lot of the ingrained Chinese-ness I thought I had dropped many years ago. I am helping my wife with some Chinese-English translations and interpretations, and through it I am finding out many things about myself and how Chinese I actually am. For example, that I cannot argue with my mother-in-law no matter how angry I am because she is my 长辈 (elder)... a crippling weakness, I know :-S.

I hope through my lessons I will re-learn my Mandarin and also by doing so learn what it means to be East, what it means to be West, and what it means to link the two.

If anyone in this forum have experiences with Chinese-Western couple relationships, I would love to hear your experiences.

If anyone is interested in participating in a survey for my wife's research, follow the link below. You will probably find as I did that the survey questions will prompt you to think about your deep rooted beliefs, and how that affects your relationships. Anyone with Chinese or Western (eg. Europe, US, Aust, NZ) ancestry can participate. You can be single and don't have to be in a relationship to answer the questions.

Survey: https://experiment.psy.uq.edu.au/yinyang/

(Please excuse the totally inappropriate use of the expression "Yin Yang" in this survey... not my wife nor my idea, I assure you.)

I haven't looked through all the lessons yet, but I hope there's a cpod lesson on "mixed marriages", or one soon if not.

Anyway, I hope to hear much from my fellow poddies. It is my privilege and pleasure to join this vibrant community. Thank you for having me. 

Hong Liang

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