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Say It Right Series

Begginer Corrections Please!

Posted by nephand May 6, 2009 in the Group General Discussion.

Tags: Beginner, Grammar, corrections

Dear all,

I'm hoping you may be able to help by correcting these two texts I've written - there are some constructions I'm not sure I've used correctly.  The first is meant to be a letter of invitation, though I'm not sure quite how to set out a letter to a friend.  They're both fictional though and a lot of the sentences are just to demonstrate usage of a grammar structure. 

Thanks in advance for any feedback and fixes you can offer!!

亲爱的 ~~,

你好吗?

请你参加五月三十日的生日聚会在中国饭店. 那天是我爸爸的生日. 他是五十三岁. 我家和朋友参加. 我们吃中饭也蛋糕. 我们从晚上八点半吃晚饭, 然后我们喝酒也听音乐.

你的朋友,
~~~

__________________________

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我跟爸爸,妈妈住在~~~.  我家有四口人. 我家有爸爸,妈妈,姐姐和我,有两只狗. 狗又可又大. 我爸爸是一声,也我妈妈不做工作.  我爸爸忙是忙,但很高.  我的房子离大学.  我在曼斯特大学学汉语.

天六点半起床, 也我跟爸爸骑车去曼斯特.  我差一刻八点到大学. 从八点到九点我复习,然后我有日. !  早上的后我跟同学吃午.  大学的不好吃.  下午我学汉语或日.  我三点半下.  我跟同学一起去咖啡. 到四点半我们说.  五点我爸爸开车送我回家. 上我吃晚饭, 复习汉语还是看电视.十一点我睡.

我的好是学. 我会,,西和一点儿汉语. 汉语难,但很有意思.

在曼斯特有多咖啡也博物.  周我去看,买东西. 斯特极好了!

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