trevorb journal jan 2011
trevorb
January 01, 2011, 06:57 PM posted in General Discussion二零一一年一月一号
这是我的先的journal post. 今天是二零一一年的先的日。
外面天气下雨了，我的两个孩子打电脑游戏，老婆在客厅看电视剧，所以我可以学习中文。
明天老婆和我出去她的老家看见他的妈妈爸爸。那里离这里很远，开车时候是三小时半。
bodawei
Sorry trevorb that should be 第一个 not 第一次; I shouldn't post so early in the morning. :)
trevorb
hi bodawei
many thanks for your support and for your comments. I've now realised I need to add something to my description as the best thing is for the journal entries to start as the first comment to a comment so that the replies to a days entry stay together.....
It's great to get some feedback on your writing as I often have an audience of one to my writing. I have lessons set for me so by the time I read them there are lots of comments that cover my questions and I have nowhere to input!
xiaophil
January 02, 2011, 03:18 AMGood idea. I might add that if you become a member of nciku.com, you can write blogs. You might want to post there too because you'll get feedback from lots of nice Chinese users. Have fun!
ouyangjun116
xiaophil,
Many thanks for the advice on the nciku. I use that website all the time for the dictionary but never ventured into their online community. I just wrote my first blog on there and within 10 minutes I've already gotten a response from a native speaker correcting it.
xiaophil
Cool! I'm glad it worked out for you. If I may ask, do you use the same name on nciku?
ouyangjun116
yep, same name, ouyangjun116. I tried looking you up on there but could not find you, so I assume you're under a different name.
xiaophil
Indeed. I go by 'beckwith'.
trevorb
I'm going to second ouyangjun116 on this, I've used nciku for a while but not ventured beyond the dictionary. I'll have a look at that too....
trevorb
January 03, 2011, 06:09 PM2011/1/2
今天我和老婆去Norwich。 我们坐车三个小时半。
到了Norwich我们马上去看老婆的爸妈。今晚我们请老婆的老朋友吃饭。
bodawei
Hi trevorb
This entry is (I think) ambiguous as to whether you are writing an account of the day's events or giving us your plans. Given that it was posted 14 hrs ago I am going to guess that you reported what happened. In that case you need to use 了 to indicate a completed action.
Unless you particularly wanted to point out that you paid, I suggest 我们跟老婆的老朋友一起吃饭了。
trevorb
once again thank you bodawei. I'm particularly bad at past tense stuff, I just cannot seem to get that yet!
That's part of the reason I thought this exercise may be good for me :-) once I embarrass myself enough I may begin to learn it!
trevorb
January 03, 2011, 06:20 PM2011/1/3
明天我必须上班。假期完了 ：-（
我们看老婆的爸妈，然后开车回家。 在家孩子跟一些朋友玩儿因为明天也大儿子的生日。
bodawei
January 01, 2011, 11:47 PMHi trevorb
This is a cool idea, all the best with the new group.
I'll accept your challenge for comments (hope this is what you mean.) I emphasise that my Chinese grammar is 很差 (limited) but for what it's worth I have a couple of suggestions you could consider.
二零一一年一月一号 - This is formal, like a Government notice. It is fine (actually gives it a literary feel which I like personally) but I think it is also ok to just write 2011/1/1. Numbers are far more common in everyday life here in China. This is how a native speaker would date a journal entry - while you would say 二零等等 。。you can just use the numbers in writing.
这是我的先的(suggest 第一次）journal post (suggest: 帖子). 今天是二零一一年的先的日。
外面天气下雨了，我的(不要的)两个孩子打电脑游戏，老婆在客厅看电视剧，所以我可以(会?）学习中文。 (Better to use 着 zhe in this kind of sentence if you are up to it, verb + 着)
明天老婆和我 (put yourself first in Chinese)出去（要去)她的老家看见他的妈妈爸爸 (just 看父母)。那里离这里很远 (?just 到哪里)，开车时候是三小时半 (just 坐车三个小时半)。
Now I should do one myself :)