Scary taxi driver: or why NOT to study Chinese

RJ LOL, yeah that migh actually work (in a week or two I have my Chinese license so I can drive myself :-P )

orangina,

you are right.

chanelle,

next time just pop him right in the eye. (the cab driver that is :-)

@Orangina: spot on! That's exactly it! :-)

(my husband tried to keep me in the house:I buy less stuff :-P , did not work *wink wink*)

RJ, perhaps it would be wisest for a woman to never go anywhere alone... but think about what the quality of your life would be if you had to follow that advice.

Horrible things do happen and of course you have to use your head, but living in fear all of the time is also a horrble thing to happen to a person. I think Chanelle has the right outlook on this one. Would really rather it wouldn't have happened, don't want it to happen again, but as it has happened it might as well make an amusing anecdote!

Andrew sorry: I misread! I noticed slightly similar behaviour when buying *antiques*. I think I wrote something about my red *Qing*desk. Maybe I just hope or want it to be ignorance, but chances are high that there are xenophopes out there :-)

baba,

Thanks for your explanation.

No it was not murder, but he did not have a taxi id (that's when i got scared a bit and not it was not a 黑车). It was not teasing either. Like in all these kind of situations, you feel it when it is ok and it is not: just intuition and facial expression / body language etc. This was not OK, but yes I can manage myself :-). I did not feel powerless or think I would die, but would not be happy to be in that situation again.

Forget the "blocking" comment, all I meant to say is, what I heard / experienced regarding the police is: when you really need them, they are not there :-). ALthough I got asked out for dinner when I reported my stolen wallet (no kidding hahaha)! So maybe they are nice after lol.

Point of the story was, sharing a daily life experience and hope it made someone smile.

RJ,

chanelle said:

In the meantime I was frantically looking for the taxi number which of course was not there!

..and as she's been there a while I presume by this she did include in her meaning the picture and ID number on the dash board [they're very prominent and noticeable the first time you jump in a cab].But I agree that he may have just been ignorant about his inappropriate unwanted approaches or the degree of discomfiture this was causing,and taking the reigns like that sounds like a good response.

i wasn't referring to the taxi driver, i meant the other guy.

lynnjiao,

"blocking the factory" basically means this second guy she referred to was standing in the way [blocking] of the way out [the door...the exit] of the factory.Very intimidating.

Thanks for answering my question.Anyone else with some insights into the police response?

Chanelle

It could very well be that he was teasing you, and had no idea that you were truly uncomfortable (were you?). I may be wrong, but I kind of figured you could pretty well take care of yourself. If something makes you wary, there is that picture and ID number on the front dash board. Take out a pencil and write it down, (or take a picture of it with your phone) shake the pencil at him, smile, and say "behave, then we can remain friends". Chances are he would laugh and then apologize. He now has new respect for you, and you allowed him to save face. Maybe Im missing something here but I hardly think this rose to the level of murder, kidnapping, and the police. I would also suggest not riding alone, in any  city.

bababardwan,

Unfortunately,I'm not sure whether the police would come.But at least your warning will stop the worse things.Who knows what would happen next?

Chanelle,

I don't know what "blocking the factory" means.I can't find it in the dictionary.

I am chinese boy

I want to study English

haha

After watching the feeling is very interesting

Just register

chanelle,

if you call the police for kidnapping .... they won’t come

..jeepers,I would hope they would [what do others think of this?] in an actual case.Unless I missed it though,I thought there was a fear of kidnapping,but no actual deviation from your route.

blocking a factory

once again,I suppose some folk will push the boundaries without necessarily breaking the law outright...the fuzzy line between just being in the way in a deliberately obstructive way and outright keeping you hostage.All very intimidating I understand,but yeah,I would have thought that unless they clearly are keeping you hostage,or get physical ,the police wouldn't be too interested unfortunately.I would think locals in particular would know just how much bad behaviour they can get away with [and also could take advantage of the fact that 老外 are unlikely to be too au fait with local laws,one's rights,and the best way to respond in such a situation...I'm not focussing on China here of course,..I think it's a globally applicable scenario].That's ,again,why such a discussion is very interesting to a 老外。。getting some insight from locals as to the law in such situation and likely police response.In fact ,I think this would be an excellent topic for a lesson..Intermediate or above.I'd love to see more police/law lesson topics.Hey,and thanks chanelle for understanding where I'm coming from.I understand how scary it must have been for you.

@Lynn, Actually, I think China is much safer than where I previously lived (Amsterdam). This is an incident and that is why it surprised me so much. Yes you are absolutely right when you say “you have to learn how to deal with it”.
@Andrew, this guy was “no good”, the rotten apple. The true feelings vary from “getting laid” to “getting money”. I only know nice taxi language and happy conversations, that was my mistake.
@Baba, I know *wink wink*, if you call the police for kidnapping or blocking a factory, they won’t come, I have no illusions that they would lift a finger for me.
@RJ, Maybe I should add *this is not my avatar*.

@all, I discussed the whole thing with my Chinese teacher during an annniversary class (I finished all her modules). She said: the more you go out (by yourself, not in a loawei pack) and you are interested and open to Chinese (language / culture / people), which I am, you will get this sort of things. Which is true.

Also, since I can only say nice things, it was time for a *special* class, or tell them how to F*ck off (in Mandarin) :-). Life in China is not always a happy BLCU textbook. So we added many new interesting words to my vocab varying from:zh*n*m*q* to s*l*ng. This might get me into more trouble, but at least I can practise them (might even learn new ones hah!) and get something out of it as well :-P

Chanelle,

I think its that new avatar :-).

lynnjiao,

I think calling the police will be the best choice at that time

...I was both surprised and intrigued by this suggestion.Naturally I felt for chanelle finding herself in this 尴尬 and scary situation [stay strong chanelle :) ] and think this is a very useful discussion to see what are some good solutions.I am not familiar with Chinese law or how the police operate and that is why I am curious.Has he broken any law,and what would be the likely reaction of the cab driver to such a suggestion,and the likely police response? [I think where I come from you'd be hard pressed to find a law broken in this case or get the police very interested,and the driver may well laugh and retort something along the lines of "and tell them what?"]

ps chanelle,by asking this question I'm sure you realise I am in no way trying to lessen the seriousness of the situation.I am merely interested in gaining some insight into how practical such advice would be in China.Whatever effective advice comes of such a discussion may be very useful to others who find themselves in a similar situation.

chanelle,

I think in most cases it is innocent like you describe in your response.  But, in this specific case  do you think that the guy's honest feelings behind what he said and did to you was really so innocent, or was it actually genuine racist/xenophobic discrimination?   

I often get that innocent (yet very annoying) reaction for being a non-typical 老外 that speaks Chinese and participates to some degree in Chinese life, but I also experience a lot of situations analogous to what you describe which, to me, appear to be plain-old genuine racism/xenophobia based on hate and fear.   Based on your description, it sounds like this "nice guy" was really the latter.  It sounds to me like this guy was actively trying to exclude you from participating in Chinese life, and indicative of this, he didn't just do it verbally, he also did it physically

Chanelle,

Thank God you are safe finally.Your tale attracts me because I am a Chinese.I feel very sorry about that.And I believe guys like that exist in China.I think calling the police will be the best choice at that time .At least you can warn him you will dial 110 immediately.

Frankly,living in China is NOT more dangerous than in any other countries.But sometimes Chinese treat a foreigner in a different way.This may make you feel uncomfortable.You have to learn how to deal with it.

Good luck!

tvan,

  What if the cab driver has his own STD collection.... with all that entails... and wants to share?

..given that he's functional enough to drive a cab [and not off his rocker on drugs],and extremely unlikely to have the full gamut of std infections,have you met such a Chinese chap [or western for that matter] who is willing to pick up something new from a "known case"? I would have thought such a scenario highly unlikely and even if he thought there might be some bluffing involved he'd opt to seek greener pastures just in case.

magnus,

Why didn't your wife like the idea? I had the same idea as you.

@tvan, did not think of that scenario yet haha, luckily my std vocab is limited *wink wink* and i most likely will not understand unless he (God forbid) drops his pants.

This makes a great lesson topic: how to scare of creepy cab drivers :-P

@magnus1977, I kind of agree with your wife.  What if the cab driver has his own STD collection.... with all that entails... and wants to share?

I generally have more problems here in the States than China.  Still, I've been the victim of a scam/attempted scam or two in China.  Actually, the last time was just a while back in Beijing.  While boarding the #1 line, two Russian (I guess) girls, both speaking fluent Mandarin, got on the train with me, one in front, one in back.  Train lurches, girl in front "bumps" into me, girl behind is a pick-pocket, next stop has a Russian guy to handle pursuit, etc.

I don't generally carry my wallet in foreign countries, so no harm, no foul.  Still, I told the story to a Chinese guy at the hotel; he told me that the only surprise was that the gang wasn't Chinese.  I guess it pays to be careful no matter where you are.  

BTW, here's the Tudou version.

@ xiaophil, yes one more story to add to my neverending Chinese story! I liked yours about the hairdresser and definately would have gone for nr 3!

@ Orangina thx. :-)

@ Magnus

Well. I already added a decade to my age I might as well fake an STD for a good cause! Great sentence, I wish I came up with that in th taxi!

Chanelle...we have two suggestions.

My wife from Shanghai says to tell the guy to shut up or you'll call the taxi company and you will lose your job!

Unless of course the guy was an underground taxi... she also said to copy down every number in the taxi.  Even the license plate.

On the other hand...

I have a great phrase you can use in this kind of situation again.

Taxi Driver: 到湖南路干吗？

dào húnán lù gànmá?

What are you doing on Hunan Road?

You: 我去医院，医生说，可能我有性传播疾病。 痒死了。

wǒ qù yīyuàn, yīshēng shuō, kěnéng wǒ yǒu xìng chuánbō jíbìng. yǎng sǐ le.

I'm going to the hospital.  The doctor said, perhaps I have a sexually transmitted disease.  I itch so much!

Just watch his eyes after that... you'll get to your destination in a jiffy.

PS.  my wife doesn't like my idea though.

Monty Python aside, Thank you for sharing your story chanelle, and your joy being here as well.

我爱中国人！

    你好吗，你好吗，你好吗，再见！

chanelle

I had an uncomfortable situation once where I was getting a haircut.  The guy cutting my hair realized that I can speak some Chinese, so he decided to have fun.  He was like, "Hey, you're an American, help me meet some American ladies...  I'm an excellent lover... I have two girlfriends right now...  Help me, okay?  Okay?" I don't think I ever said 我会考虑一下 so many times in such a short period of time.  Every staff member and customer was of course listening in with a slight or outright smirk.  Actually, I couldn't decide if he was repulsive, annoying, fun or all of the above.  In the end, I decided to convince myself it was option three as my hair was in his hands.  Obviously, my situation wasn't scary such as yours, and for that I feel sorry that you had to go through that, but at least you have a story now, right?

Tvan / Tal Hahaha great pick! That is a funny song!

@tal, of course, as a Brit you are right on!  I guess I need to start uploading my videos to tudou too.

I didn't see it either chanelle, but I'd bet any money that this is the song that tvan posted.

Tvan thx for sharing :-) I wish I could see it (GFW  blocked it), but I LOVE Monty Python!

@chanelle, you've got the right attitude!  Words of (somewhat dated, stereotypical) wisdom from Monty Python.   

@ zhen, when I read back my story, i is not flattering for ladies having 10 years more experience than me, that was not my intention ;-). Adding 30 years was just a little over the top, but I am sure you know what  I meant! *wink wink*.

When I read the rest of your story:if I go for the cab driver I do not have to cook anymore and gone for 24 hrs sounds soo atractive haha!

@ Andrew, thank you for your concern!

Thankfully these are exceptions and most of my interaction (especially women) have been very positive.

I truly believe that "racist" attitudes, most of the time are a mix of curiosity, innocent spontanity, enthusiasm, lack of knowledge / opportunities or different ways of communicating. Basically meaning no real (personal) harm intended. The more you know about the other, most of the time for me it get's much better :-) (except for the scary drivers that is haha)

Last night, when my bottle of gas was finished: I called the hotline and I I was a bit off. The lady on the phone said: no worries, we know who you are and 我听的懂。Withing 15 mins the gas guy came, carried the bottle inside AND helped me to change it (my husband does that). That is my average experience :-)

Although the story might come across scary or negative the opposite was intended. After 2 years I have a deep connection with China and it has become part of me. We are lucky / grateful to have one year added to our stay.

The first part of your story was scary.  I'm glad you were OK in the end.

The second part is typical, and yet another example of the xenophobic and racist attitudes of the vast majority of Chinese people towards everyone else (some are just more blatant than others).  

... make myself very unattractive. He started talking about my age (42 first time I added 10 years) ...
hahaha, thanks a lot Chanelle!

I too when I was younger thought that being 40+ meant you no longer had to deal with that kind of nonsense. But that is not really true. You continue to have annoyances, just different varieties (you will begin being annoyed by snotty kids young enough to be your sons, who think it's funny, think it's sport to play at hitting on women our age. they'll say "Noooo! You look barely ... 26! You're not old!" Very Tiresome).

I had a cab driver shamelessly self-promote many years ago in Tokyo, not dangerous or scary though. I think that particular person was honestly just trying to meet as many prospects as he could on the job for possible marriage.
He was saying to me, "It's not generally known, but we cab drivers make pretty good husbands. Once we go on a shift we're gone for at least 24 hours, that's all that free time to yourself, we're not like the salarymen husbands who come home every night late and expect you to cook every meal like a chef. And our work exhausts us so, we aren't ... demanding. Do you think you might be interested? You should give it some serious thought." "Oh" I said.

I'm happy to say I haven't had your type of scary cab driver.
The scary ones I've met in Japan were usually not very healthy mentally. You'll always be with your husband I'm sure, but in any case I still hope you only get the good drivers while in Tokyo!

Yes, you are very right :-)

Your Dutch, Chanelle. Try to take a taxi in Amsterdam and you will love every single chinese taxi-driver....in a purely platonic way ofcourse.

No problem,  will not miss those at all! Just spending some time with my husband and have a nice dinner together / walk around Tokyo is the best x mas for me! :-)

Hi chanelle77

In Japan, people get into "happy-new-year" mode immediately after Chiristmas ends. So I guess you would scarcely see Christmas decorations on December 26/27 in Tokyo, unlike China, hehe.

Hi chanelle77

Please be noted that "hai" in Japanese often merely means "I'm hearing you", but not necessarily means "yes/OK/understand", hehe. Have a nice trip in Japan!

Changye, happy I made you smile! After I got out of the cab I laughed, but the experience was quite scary :-). In stead of a gun I should get a BIG chubby dog and drag it with me every where!

Actually 10 mins. ago I called a restaurant in Tokyo (tempura: ten-ichi), I spoke half English / half Chinese and THINK I made a dinner reservation :-). The guy said "hai" a lot and ended with "moshi moshi" and "domo arigato" (unfortunately  he spoke little english / chinese and my Japanese is not what its used to be *kidding*), but I have a good feeling! We will see what happens when I get there...

Zhen also helped me out a lot with some good info!

Now, I only need two more restaurants for the 25th and 26th (our short vacay revolves around food hahah!). Cannot wait to go to Japan!

Hi chanelle77

42 first time I added 10 years

Sorry, I just can't resist laughing loud. Why don't you get a stun gun (made in China) just in case? This is not a joke.

By the way, did you find a good sushi restaurant in Tokyo?

Agree with you Tal :-). Just wanted to share another facet of Chinese life (in a humouristic way). Besides my lousy domestic skills I am very stubborn, strong willed and optimistic, so I will not give in hahaha!

An engrossing tale chanelle, even if an edgy one. I'm afraid it's true that greater fluency in Chinese increases one's awareness of the things you mention. Perhaps when one is struggling up the lower slopes of the Mandarin mountain one's eyes are fixed so firmly on the path that certain details of the landscape can be missed.

Don't be discouraged though, and keep that strong heart! I have days where I seem to encounter more of the annoyances, and days when I repeatedly run into delight. I've come to think holding delight in the mind is the way to go. But as a foreigner living in China, a mental 'shield' should always be kept ready. That's just the way it is.